(no subject)

Today I found out that the placement test I need to take to get into college is today! I was Not Amused. Fortunately I was still able to sign up for it. It doesn't cut into lunch and it gets me out of APGov, so I guess it isn't all that bad. Plus it's all on computers. I bet I'll go through it really fast.

Yesterday something strange happened to me. I had a dim recollection of reading a story with a certain mood that really appealed to me, and I wanted to go back and read more of it, but I couldn't remember what it was. Then I realised, I can't go back and read more of it, because there isn't any more to read - because I haven't written it yet. (I was oddly disappointed when I realised that...)

It's trying, really. The story I'm writing right now is a story that I want to read, a story that is so vivid in my mind that I can see the scenes playing like a film. But even though I can see what's happening, I can't figure out how to put it into words. I can't figure out how to write it. It's a two-fold frustration, because I can't read this story until after I've written it, and I'm going to be in the characters' heads until after I've written it, and that's not the greatest of places for me to be right now.

Ordinarily I might try drawing some of the scenes that stand out the most to me, but they're giving me so much trouble in writing that I think they'll defy me no matter what way I try to render them. I'm not sure what to do, other than try to force the words out. They may not come quickly and they may not come easily, but if I keep at it, I suppose they'll come eventually.

In the meantime, I can stare at my new Keats icon and my nails, which are a shade of purple that made Pinky jealous and that, I think, I am rather partial to.

(no subject)

Quick post because I was just reminded of this and think it's important:

Fifty years ago today, the first human being went into space. Thirty years ago today, the first space shuttle was launched.

How far have we come since then? How much further do we have to go? How much further are we going to go?

I know the answer to the first question, and to the second. I don't know the answer to the third question, but I'm afraid of what it might be. I'm afraid that it might be "not very," or even "not at all."

Anybody reading this journal is probably very well aware of my feelings about the space program and space exploration, so I don't think I need to go over all that again. (Plus I'm being hounded to edit articles right now, so I don't really have the time to go over all that again.) However, I will say this: I hope we don't stop. I hope we never stop. We can't get complacent with the things we've already accomplished - we need to use them to drive ourselves to accomplish more, not because we need to accomplish more, but because we can. We're human, after all - that's what we do.

(no subject)

l-lots of posts today I know .___.

More importantly, I have been placed! Apparently I am ready for Normal College Freshman English, although I think I might actually already have credits for that (except community college doesn't care about AP scores, so I actually don't, even though I would if I went to a Real College). I have a choice between a whopping five maths classes! I think these classes are Stats, Calculus, more Calculus, Trig, and Maths For People Who Suck At Maths, although, according to the course catalogue I found, they're all for people who suck at maths, so idk. (I do know that I won't be taking Trig, because the course description itself says that students in the course "seem very reticent about memorizing the special trig values, such as cos (π/6)". I've already had two years of maths with students like that, thanks, I don't think I'll be paying for a third.) I'll probably take either Finite Mathematics or Maths for Liberal Arts, depending on how masochistic I'm feeling when I register for classes.

I'm starting to feel that maths and I have a very complicated relationship. Normally when people ask me about maths, I reply, "I hate maths! Maths and I don't get along. We just aren't meant to be." The thing is, I'm not actually bad at maths. If I know what I'm doing, I'm actually really good at maths. Trig, for example. I am fucking amazing at trig. This is because I actually understand trig (except for analytical trig, which can fuck off and die for all I care, although I'm actually pretty good at it if you ignore the lowering powers part). Logarithms, on the other hand, I am not so good at. "When you put numbers like this, it means you're actually doing this other thing with them that isn't what it looks like at all." That is basically how I describe logarithms. (Although I have been assured that all you really need to know about logs for trig is that ln and e cancel each other out, which is pretty simple to remember.) And functions! There is absolutely no reason to have to solve f(g(h(k(x)))). There just isn't.

tl;dr: maths for the sake of maths is stupid and I don't suck at English. Those are the only two important points in this entire post. Now I think I am going to go eat a chocolate muffin.