(no subject)

I should like to be able to be as flippant about my own issues as Tony Stark can be about his. I know that's not a very good thing to aspire to, but I aspire to it nonetheless.

It's not like I have issues anywhere near Stark's, but I do empathise with him a little bit (says the nineteen year old college student) in terms of being lonely. If I'd just reach out I'm sure I could find ways to not be lonely, but reaching out - admitting that you need something - is hard. And, I mean, almost all of Tony's friends are ones he built himself. Maybe that works for him (I don't think it does) but it doesn't work for me. I can't build my own friends.

...actually, in a way I could, but that's a bit more pathetic than I really want to feel right now. (Like coming home from the park after only an hour because you can sit around by yourself just as well at home as you can there is really any better.)

I'm going to go find some internet friends now. (And by internet friends, I mean Bleach characters, because I'm kind of on a Bleach kick right now.)

(no subject)

I seem to have posted this everywhere else, so why not here? : The captain haori in Bleach look super comfortable and I kind of wish I had one. (The part I haven't mentioned anywhere else: I feel kind of like a weeaboo for feeling like that. I mean... on the one hand it's fashion, but on the other hand isn't it kind of appropriation? Especially because I did some googling and women's haori don't look as comfy; it's a sleeve thing, mostly, because the sleeves on women's haori don't connect to the body all the way - apparently this is because women wear wider obi higher up than men do, so their sleeves have to accommodate them - and men's do - but then it's also a length thing, too, since the ones the captains wear in Bleach are really long and most the ones you see online are short - and this is because the longer the haori is the more formal it is, so obviously you wouldn't wear a long one to just kick around town or whatever in -

The point is that I wouldn't be wearing it properly in the slightest and that makes me feel a little bit uncomfortable, which probably means I shouldn't be wearing one at all. Although I imagine a shorter haori with short-ish sleeves might actually look pretty cute over a long-sleeved shirt... of course I'm short myself so I probably couldn't pull that look off and damn it I need to not look up crochet patterns stop thinking about this.)

I definitely didn't mean to words about haori forever, but I think I'll just leave it there and put what I actually meant to write about in a new post. Because I can.

(no subject)

Okay, intended post time now. Earlier today I went to the park by myself. It was a bit boring, really, and I got sunburnt. Of course, I was trying to get sunburnt, but I didn't really get burnt where I was trying to, so that kind of defeats the point. I've definitely had worse burns, though, so it's really not that annoying.

...okay, actual intended post time now.

For some reason I went through what I have written of phase sky drift (that's not its actual name I swear; I just couldn't think of anything at the time and so strung some words together, and I don't know enough about the story to come up with anything better). My big problem is that I want to write more but I don't know enough about the story to do it.

Well, actually my big problem is that there are two stories at play here, and they're both interesting and I want to write them both, but they don't play well together (read: the first one spoils almost all the plot twists of the second one). So obviously the second one is the more interesting one, because not only is there its own conflict but there's also the solving the mystery of what happened in the first story (since there are only two people who know and they aren't talking about it); the first one is interesting on its own, in an "it got worse" way, but not as interesting.

So - the first story is about a war, and how Reithe and Tolreis win that war. The second story takes place five years later and is about what happens after, where Reithe and Tolreis get to stumble about trying to fix the problem they thought they'd solved while trying not to let anybody know what actually happened. (This is why the viewpoint character can't be either one of them, because the obviously already know what they did and therefore there is no mystery. Well... there could be in an unreliable narrator sense, but that feels a bit contrived even without writing it. Unfortunately the viewpoint character I have is fucking boring, because of course he has to have his own character arc, and of course I picked the 'lazy prince who learns a sense of responsibility' character arc for him, because I am dumb.)

The thing is, I only vaguely know how they won the war and I have basically no idea what the problem they thought they'd thought they solved was.

So there's that.